My Apology

 I’m sorry that I drag you down

You’re far away right now

And I just keep thinking you’ve forgotten about me

The only way we can talk is through letters

And I haven’t gotten one in weeks

My first thought is you’ve lost interest in the idea of me

You deserve someone that believes when you say you need and love me

I’m sorry but I will always have a bit of doubt

I am broken and no longer able to trust

I can’t even trust myself

Because one day I will feel like I am on top of the world

And the next I am screaming into my pillow at 3 in the morning

Just begging for the pain to stop

My feelings are bipolar and I know it is the most frustrating thing ever

One day I can be so understanding and calm

And the next I can be a complete train wreck and just looking for heartbreak

I wish I could transport all my memories to you just for a minute

so you could see what I have been through

Maybe then you’d understand why I am the way I am

I wish I could forget all the bad things trust me

I can’t apologize enough for the way I am

I love you more than anything

And it kills me that some days you don’t believe that’s true

I may be broken and confused, but I know one thing for sure

I love you unapologetically and unconditionally

So bare with me

Listen to me when I have a bad day

It will mean the world to me